Before today, the one bright side of being a quadriplegic (besides reduced shoe and glove expenses) was the fact that you didn't have to wait three hours in a line to be serenaded by multicultural animatronic children on Disney's It's a Small World theme park ride. That has come to an end now that Disney has discontinued their program of letting disabled people cut in line at their theme parks, according to The Hollywood Reporter. Instead, they will now have to use a program similar to the Fast Pass system that allows them to reserve a spot in line, wait out the time they would have spent on line being harassed by creepy costumed Goofies, and come back when it's their turn to go on the ride.
Apparently, the reason for the switch is that rich people were hiring disabled people to go to the park with them so they didn't have to wait in line. Thanks, 1%ers. Not only are you ruining the economy, you're now taking your lack of accountability for it all to unprecedented levels and letting disabled people take the fall for your abuses of money and power at Disneyland.
The happiest place on earth, for fuck's sake!
Um... yeah, we started out this article planning to be funny, but now we're just angry. Sorry about that.
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