Comic book fans on the internet were taken by surprise today when digital comics purveyor comiXology reportedly called out to them from the shadows of a dark alleyway, inviting them to try a taste of dangerous and seductive digital comics. Citing their sponsorship of the Geek Stage at the SXSW festival in Austin, TX, comiXology told passersby that it intended to provide them with free digital comics and graphic novels all weekend long in hopes of getting them hooked on a lifetime habit of destructively purchasing and enjoying digital comics.
"I didn't know what to do," said one anonymous comics reader who told The Outhouse of her frightening experience. "I told comiXology that I don't do digital comics. I'm a good girl. But they wouldn't take no for an answer."
According to the reader, comiXolgy tried to entice her with copies of the first issues of Batman '66, Lego: Ninjago, and Injustice: Gods Among Us, as well as the entire first volume of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic.
"I was really scared," the reader admitted. "comiXology looked very dangerous, and they were very aggressive. Eventually I took a copy of Locke and Key Vol. 1 and walked away as quickly as possible. I don't know yet if I'm gonna try it. A lot of my friends are doing digital comics."
Reportedly, comiXology told the reader that she could come back and find them whenever she wanted another taste of the comics, and that they would be giving away new books every day during the festival.
At press time, police had forced comiXology to vacate the alleyway, but the company has reportedly set up shop in a children's playground on the other side of town, where they're said to be lurking suspiciously and looking around nervously.
For more on this story, visit comiXology's free comics page here.