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Exclusive: Cullen Bunn Offers Outhousers Exclusive "No Comment"

Written by Elf With a Gun on Thursday, March 27 2014 and posted in News with Benefits

Exclusive: Cullen Bunn Offers Outhousers Exclusive

When the long-time Outhousers favorite and writer of the forthcoming Hellbreak says "EXCLUSIVE" he means "EXCLUSIVE"

On Tuesday, Outhousers ace reporter Jude Terror broke the story of Cullen Bunn and Brian Churilla's EXCLUSIVE interview with Comic Book Resources regarding their new comic Hellbreak

This reporter dutifully decided to investigate the boundaries of this much-tauted EXCLUSIVITY by reaching out to Bunn for a quick interview. It's no secret that Bunn is a long-time favorite here at The Outhousers, but what isn't public knowledge is Bunn's decade+ of friendship with this reporter's real-life alter-ego, as well as his love of the character from which this reporter adopted his pseudonym. Indeed, it was rumored that Bunn had even planned to feature the return of Elf With a Gun in an upcoming issue of Fearless Defenders before Marvel callously canceled the book as part of their new 'We'll Arbitrarily Relaunch It At Some Date With A Point New Now' initative.

With these factors in mind, an interview would seem almost certain, yes?

Apparently not. This reporter was shocked when, after emailing Bunn at 9am Wednesday morning, he still hadn't received a response by noon today (Thursday). So much for ten plus years of friendship and a mutual love of classic Steve Gerber characters, you scumfuck!

Anyway, as Mr. Bunn's failure to answer constitutes (in this reporter's mind) a clear "No comment", I am reproducing the original questions below, with Mr. Bunn's obviously intended answers.


ELF: Got time for a quick EXCLUSIVE interview?

BUNN: No comment.

ELF: What did you have for breakfast this morning?

BUNN: No comment.

ELF: What did you have for lunch?

BUNN: No comment.

ELF: Any plans for dinner?

BUNN: No comment.

ELF: Anything you can tell us EXCLUSIVELY about Hellbreak that you didn't EXCLUSIVELY reveal to CBR?

BUNN: No comment.


So there you have it, folks. Apparently, when Cullen Bunn says exclusive, he means exclusive. We will update this story further if there is a comment. 

It should also be noted that for some odd reason, Brian Churilla's last name makes this reporter hungry, and now, after typing it, it's time for lunch!



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About the Author - Elf With a Gun

Elf With a Gun appeared in several Marvel comics of the 70s and 80s, most notably harassing The Defenders and Spider-Man, before being abducted by Steve Gerber for use as a foil against Destroyer Duck. After wandering the wastelands of Forgotten Comic Character Limbo, he hitched a ride on the ThanosCopter and now resides at the Outhouse, bringing his snark, elf hat, pointy shoes, and very big gun to a new generation of comic readers. His Give-A-Fuck quotient is stuck at zero. 

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