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Outhouse Snubbed Again in 2014 Eisner Nominations, Fires Back With Unhinged Rant

Outhouse Snubbed Again in 2014 Eisner Nominations, Fires Back With Unhinged Rant

All 2014 nominees are now officially on the satirical website's 2014 shit list.



Source: Comic-Con.org

Fueled by jealousy and righteous indignation on Tuesday, satirical website The Outhouse blasted the Eisner Awards committee following the announcement of the crop of 2014 nominees, none of which included The Outhouse. The choices particularly enraged Outhouse webmaster Jude Terror, who was sure that this would be The Outhouse's year.

"What the fuck are they thinking?" said Terror, spittle flying wantonly from his mouth, upon learning that The Outhouse did not receive a nomination for Best Comics-Related Periodical/Journalism. "Comic Book Resources? Is ass-kissing journalism now? And Multiversity? They're practically Newsarama Junior!"

Terror said that he regretted helping out Multiversity with some technical advice last year when they had some unexpected DNS issues with their web server, saying that he wished he had allowed them to languish for several more minutes until someone else solved the problem. "That would have fixed them," Terror reckoned, promising to no longer visit the website every day. "If I had known they would go on to get an Eisner nomination over us, I would have acted like a petulant baby then, instead of waiting until now."

Enraged, Terror continued to rail against the other journalism nominees. Terror took special issue with The Comics Journal, which received two nominations, one for their publication and one for their website, making several meanspirited and disparaging remarks about veteran journalist and bony saltwater fish Tom Spurgeon in the process. "Fuck that guy," Terror said of Spurgeon, before realizing that he was confusing The Comics Journal with The Comics Reporter, where Spurgeon actually writes.

"Fuck him anyway," Terror responded, unmoved. "And fuck Zainab Akhtar too."

Terror had some strong words for Akhtar, the proprietor of the blog Comics and Cola. "Get the fuck out of here with with your thoughtful commentary on the indie comics and graphic novel scene."

"Come at me, bro!" Terror warned, apparently oblivious to the fact that Akhtar is a woman.

In addition to irrationally raging against the journalism nominees, Terror expressed disdain for the nominees of every category, pointing out, "Oh yeah, it's totally appropriate that Fantagraphics received seventeen nominations - that's the same number of people that read their comics."

Terror promised to hold a personal vendetta against every comic, publisher, creator, and journalist on the list of nominees for at least the next year, and to express that vendetta through vicious attack pieces on The Outhouse. Terror then excused himself to begin work on a massive diatribe discrediting the work of United States Congressman and Civil Rights Leader John Lewis, whose March (Book One) scored a nomination for Top Shelf in the Best Publication for Teens category as well as two other nominations, promising that next up would be legendary indie creator Ed Piskor, whose Hip Hop Family Tree was nominated for Best Reality-Based Work and Best Lettering.

"Ed Piskor is the sole nominee in the 2014 Kiss Jude Terror's Ass Awards," Terror pronounced belligerently.

"And don't even get me started on that Jordie Bellaire," he added, referencing the colorist whose work Terror seemed to enjoy in at least five different series this year, including Pretty Deadly, Zero, The Massive, and Captain Marvel. "Pfft. Anyone could have made those books rich and breathtaking with meaningful color design. Color me unimpressed."

Terror then tore up a copy of Itty Bitty Hellboy by Art Baltazar and Franco, despite The Outhouse giving the book a positive review just last week.

The Eisner Awards will be handed out at San Diego Comic Con on Friday, July 25th. Jude Terror has already announced plans to get totally wasted and show up at the ceremony to heckle the judges and winners before collapsing outside the venue, sobbing embarrassingly in a puddle of his own tears and vomit. For future reference, here is the full list of people, publishers, and comics that The Outhouse plans to senselessly attack out of petty jealousy and spite for the next twelve months or longer:

 

Best Short Story

  • "Go Owls," by Adrian Tomine, in Optic Nerve #13 (Drawn & Quarterly) 
  • "Mars to Stay," by Brett Lewis and Cliff Chiang, in Witching Hour (DC) 
  • "Seaside Home," by Josh Simmons, in Habit #1 (Oily) 
  • "Untitled," by Gilbert Hernandez, in Love and Rockets: New Stories #6 (Fantagraphics) 
  • "When Your House Is Burning Down, You Should Brush Your Teeth," by Matthew Inman, theoatmeal.com/comics/house

Best Single Issue (or One-Shot) 

  • Demeter, by Becky Cloonan (self-published) 
  • Hawkeye #11: "Pizza Is My Business," by Matt Fraction and David Aja (Marvel) 
  • Love and Rockets: New Stories #6, by Gilbert Hernandez and Jaime Hernandez (Fantagraphics) 
  • Viewotron #2, by Sam Sharpe (self-published) 
  • Watson and Holmes #6, by Brandon Easton, and N. Steven Harris (New Paradigm Studios)

Best Continuing Series

  • East of West, by Jonathan Hickman and Nick Dragotta (Image) 
  • Hawkeye, by Matt Fraction and David Aja (Marvel) 
  • Nowhere Men, by Eric Stephenson and Nate Bellegarde (Image) 
  • Saga, by Brian K. Vaughan and Fiona Staples (Image) 
  • Sex Criminals, by Matt Fraction and Chip Zdarsky (Image)

Best Limited Series

  • The Black Beetle: No Way Out, by Francesco Francavilla (Dark Horse) 
  • Colder, by Paul Tobin and Juan Ferreyra (Dark Horse) 
  • 47 Ronin, by Mike Richardson and Stan Sakai (Dark Horse) 
  • Trillium, by Jeff Lemire (Vertigo/DC) 
  • The Wake, by Scott Snyder and Sean Murphy (Vertigo/DC)

Best New Series

  • High Crimes, by Christopher Sebela and Ibrahim Moustafa (Monkeybrain) 
  • Lazarus, by Greg Rucka and Michael Lark (Image) 
  • Rat Queens, by Kurtis J. Wiebe and Roc Upchurch (Image/Shadowline) 
  • Sex Criminals, by Matt Fraction and Chip Zdarsky (Image) 
  • Watson and Holmes, by Karl Bollers, Rick Leonardi, Paul Mendoza et al. (New Paradigm Studios)

Best Publication for Early Readers (up to age 7) 

  • Benjamin Bear in Bright Ideas, by Philippe Coudray (TOON Books) 
  • The Big Wet Balloon, by Liniers (TOON Books) 
  • Itty Bitty Hellboy, by Art Baltazar and Franco (Dark Horse) 
  • Odd Duck, by Cecil Castellucci and Sara Varon (First Second) 
  • Otto's Backwards Day, by Frank Cammuso (with Jay Lynch) (TOON Books)

Best Publication for Kids (ages 8-12)

  • The Adventures of Superhero Girl, by Faith Erin Hicks (Dark Horse) 
  • Hilda and the Bird Parade, by Luke Pearson (Nobrow) 
  • Jane, the Fox, and Me, by Fanny Britt and Isabelle Arsenault (Groundwood) 
  • The Lost Boy, by Greg Ruth (Graphix/Scholastic) 
  • Mouse Guard: Legends of the Guard, vol. 2, edited by David Petersen, Paul Morrissey, and Rebecca Taylor (Archaia/BOOM!) 
  • Star Wars: Jedi Academy, by Jeffrey Brown (Scholastic)

Best Publication for Teens (ages 13-17) 

  • Battling Boy, by Paul Pope (First Second) 
  • Bluffton: My Summers with Buster, by Matt Phelan (Candlewick) 
  • Boxers and Saints, by Gene Luen Yang (First Second) 
  • Dogs of War, by Sheila Keenan and Nathan Fox (Graphix/Scholastic) 
  • March (Book One), by John Lewis, Andrew Aydin, and Nate Powell (Top Shelf) 
  • Templar, by Jordan Mechner, LeUyen Pham, and Alex Puviland (First Second)

Best Humor Publication

  • The Adventures of Superhero Girl, by Faith Erin Hicks (Dark Horse) 
  • The Complete Don Quixote, by Miguel de Cervantes and Rob Davis (SelfMadeHero) 
  • The (True!) History of Art, by Sylvain Coissard and Alexis Lemoine (SelfMadeHero) 
  • Vader's Little Princess, by Jeffrey Brown (Chronicle) 
  • You're All Just Jealous of My Jetpack, by Tom Gauld (Drawn & Quarterly)

Best Anthology

  • Dark Horse Presents, edited by Mike Richardson (Dark Horse) 
  • Nobrow #8: Hysteria, edited by Sam Arthur and Alex Spiro (Nobrow) 
  • Outlaw Territory, edited by Michael Woods (Image) 
  • Smoke Signal, edited by Gabe Fowler (Desert Island) 
  • Thrilling Adventure Hour, by Ben Acker, Ben Blacker et al. (Archaia/BOOM!)

Best Digital/Webcomic

  • As the Crow Flies, by Melanie Gillman, www.melaniegillman.com
  • Failing Sky, by Dax Tran-Caffee, failingsky.com
  • High Crimes, by Christopher Sebela and Ibrahim Moustafa (Monkeybrain), www.monkeybraincomics.com/titles/high-crimes/
  • The Last Mechanical Monster, by Brian Fies, lastmechanicalmonster.blogspot.com
  • The Oatmeal by Matthew Inman, theoatmeal.com

Best Reality-Based Work

  • A Bag of Marbles, by Joseph Joffo, Kris, and Vincent Bailly (Graphic Universe/Lerner) 
  • The Fifth Beatle: The Brian Epstein Story, by Vivek J. Tiwary, Andrew C. Robinson, and Kyle Baker (M Press/Dark Horse) 
  • Hip Hop Family Tree, vol. 1, by Ed Piskor (Fantagraphics) 
  • March (Book One), by John Lewis, Andrew Aydin, and Nate Powell (Top Shelf) 
  • Today Is the Last Day of the Rest of Your Life, by Ulli Lust (Fantagraphics) 
  • Woman Rebel: The Margaret Sanger Story, by Peter Bagge (Drawn & Quarterly)

Best Graphic Album—New

  • Bluffton: My Summers with Buster, by Matt Phelan (Candlewick) 
  • The Encyclopedia of Early Earth, by Isabel Greenberg (Little, Brown) 
  • Good Dog, by Graham Chaffee (Fantagraphics) 
  • Homesick by Jason Walz (Tinto Press) 
  • The Property, by Rutu Modan (Drawn & Quarterly) 
  • War Brothers, by Sharon McKay and Daniel LaFrance (Annick Press)

Best Adaptation from Another Medium

  • The Castle, by Franz Kafka, adapted by David Zane Mairowitz and Jaromír 99 (SelfMadeHero) 
  • The Complete Don Quixote, by Miguel de Cervantes, adapted by Rob Davis (SelfMadeHero) 
  • Django Unchained, adapted by Quentin Tarantino, Reginald Hudlin, R. M. Guéra et al. (DC/Vertigo) 
  • Richard Stark's Parker: Slayground, by Donald Westlake, adapted by Darwyn Cooke (IDW) 
  • The Strange Tale of Panorama Island, by Edogawa Rampo, adapted by Suehiro Maruo (Last Gasp)

Best Graphic Album—Reprint

  • The Creep, by John Arcudi and Jonathan Case (Dark Horse) 
  • Hand-Drying in America and Other Stories, by Ben Katchor (Pantheon) 
  • Heck, by Zander Cannon (Top Shelf) 
  • Julio's Day, by Gilbert Hernandez (Fantagraphics) 
  • RASL, by Jeff Smith (Cartoon Books) 
  • Solo: The Deluxe Edition, edited by Mark Chiarello (DC)

Best Archival Collection/Project—Strips

  • Barnaby, vol. 1, by Crockett Johnson, edited by Philip Nel and Eric Reynolds (Fantagraphics) 
  • Percy Crosby's Skippy Daily Comics, vol. 2: 1928–1930, edited by Jared Gardner and Dean Mullaney (LOAC/IDW) 
  • Prince Valiant vols. 6-7, by Hal Foster, edited by Kim Thompson (Fantagraphics) 
  • Society Is Nix: Gleeful Anarchy at the Dawn of the American Comic Strip, edited by Peter Maresca (Sunday Press) 
  • Tarzan: The Complete Russ Manning Newspaper Strips, vol. 1, edited by Dean Mullaney (LOAC/IDW) 
  • VIP: The Mad World of Virgil Partch, edited by Jonathan Barli (Fantagraphics)

Best Archival Collection/Project—Comic Books

  • Best of EC Artist's Edition, edited by Scott Dunbier (IDW) 
  • Canteen Kate, by Matt Baker (Canton Street Press) 
  • In the Days of the Mob, by Jack Kirby (DC) 
  • MAD Artist's Edition, edited by Scott Dunbier (IDW) 
  • Will Eisner's The Spirit Artist's Edition, edited by Scott Dunbier (IDW)

Best U.S. Edition of International Material

  • Adventures of a Japanese Businessman, by Jose Domingo (Nobrow) 
  • Goddam This War! by Jacques Tardi and Jean-Pierre Verney (Fantagraphics) 
  • Incidents in the Night, Book One, by David B. (Uncivilized Books) 
  • Today Is the Last Day of the Rest of Your Life, by Ulli Lust (Fantagraphics) 
  • When David Lost His Voice, by Judith Vanistendael (SelfMadeHero)

Best U.S. Edition of International Material—Asia

  • The Heart of Thomas, by Moto Hagio (Fantagraphics) 
  • The Mysterious Underground Men, by Osamu Tezuka (PictureBox) 
  • Showa: A History of Japan, 1926–1939, by Shigeru Mizuki (Drawn & Quarterly) 
  • Summit of the Gods, vol. 4, by Yemmakura Baku and Jiro Taniguchi (Fanfare/Ponent Mon) 
  • Utsubora: The Story of a Novelist, by Asumiko Nakamura (Vertical)

Best Writer

  • Kelly Sue DeConnick, Pretty Deadly (Image); Captain Marvel (Marvel) 
  • Matt Fraction, Sex Criminals (Image); Hawkeye, Fantastic Four, FF (Marvel) 
  • Jonathan Hickman, East of West, The Manhattan Projects (Image); Avengers, Infinity (Marvel) 
  • Scott Snyder, Batman (DC); American Vampire, The Wake (DC/Vertigo) 
  • Eric Stephenson, Nowhere Men (Image) 
  • Brian K. Vaughan, Saga (Image)

Best Writer/Artist

  • Isabel Greenberg, The Encyclopedia of Early Earth (Little, Brown) 
  • Jaime Hernandez, Love and Rockets New Stories #6 (Fantagraphics) 
  • Terry Moore, Rachel Rising (Abstract Studio) 
  • Luke Pearson, Hilda and the Bird Parade (Nobrow) 
  • Matt Phelan, Bluffton: My Summers with Buster (Candlewick) 
  • Judith Vanistendael, When David Lost His Voice (SelfMadeHero)

Best Penciller/Inker or Penciller/Inker Team

  • Nate Bellegarde, Nowhere Men (Image) 
  • Nick Dragotta, East of West (Image) 
  • Sean Murphy, The Wake (DC/Vertigo) 
  • Nate Powell, March (Book One) (Top Shelf) 
  • Emma Ríos, Pretty Deadly (Image) 
  • Thomas Yeates, Law of the Desert Born: A Graphic Novel (Bantam)

Best Painter/Multimedia Artist (interior art) 

  • Andrew C. Robinson, The Fifth Beatle (Dark Horse) 
  • Sonia Sanchéz, Here I Am (Capstone) 
  • Fiona Staples, Saga (Image) 
  • Ive Svorcina, Thor (Marvel) 
  • Marguerite Van Cook, 7 Miles a Second (Fantagraphics) 
  • Judith Vanistendael, When David Lost His Voice (SelfMadeHero)

Best Cover Artist

  • David Aja, Hawkeye (Marvel) 
  • Mike Del Mundo, X-Men Legacy (Marvel) 
  • Sean Murphy/Jordie Belaire, The Wake (DC/Vertigo) 
  • Emma Ríos, Pretty Deadly (Image) 
  • Chris Samnee, Daredevil (Marvel) 
  • Fiona Staples, Saga (Image)

Best Coloring

  • Jordie Bellaire, The Manhattan Projects, Nowhere Men, Pretty Deadly, Zero (Image); The Massive (Dark Horse); Tom Strong (DC); X-Files Season 10 (IDW); Captain Marvel, Journey into Mystery (Marvel); Numbercruncher (Titan); Quantum and Woody (Valiant) 
  • Steve Hamaker, Mylo Xyloto (Bongo), Strangers in Paradise 20th Anniversary Issue 1 (Abstract Studio), RASL (Cartoon Books) 
  • Matt Hollingsworth, Hawkeye, Daredevil: End of Days (Marvel); The Wake (DC/Vertigo) 
  • Frank Martin, East of West (Image) 
  • Dave Stewart, Abe Sapien, Baltimore: The Infernal Train, BPRD: Hell on Earth, Conan the Barbarian, Hellboy: Hell on Earth, The Massive, The Shaolin Cowboy, Sledgehammer 44 (Dark Horse)

Best Lettering

  • Darwyn Cooke, Richard Stark's Parker: Slayground (IDW) 
  • Carla Speed McNeil, Bad Houses; "Finder" in Dark Horse Presents (Dark Horse) 
  • Terry Moore, Rachel Rising (Abstract Studio) 
  • Ed Piskor, Hip Hop Family Tree (Fantagraphics) 
  • Britt Wilson, Adventure Time with Fiona and Cake (kaBOOM!)

Best Comics-Related Periodical/Journalism

  • Comic Book Resources, produced by Jonah Weiland, www.comicbookresources.com
  • The Comics Journal #302, edited by Gary Groth and Kristy Valenti (Fantagraphics) 
  • Comics and Cola, by Zainab Akhtar, www.comicsandcola.com
  • Multiversity Comics, edited by Matthew Meylikhov, www.multiversitycomics.com
  • tcj.com, edited by Dan Nadel and Timothy Hodler (Fantagrapahics), www.tcj.com

Best Comics-Related Book

  • Al Capp: A Life to the Contrary, by Michael Schumacher and Denis Kitchen (Bloomsbury) 
  • The Art of Rube Goldberg, selected by Jennifer George (Abrams ComicArts) 
  • Co-Mix: A Retrospective of Comics, Graphics, and Scraps, by Art Spiegelman (Drawn & Quarterly) 
  • Genius, Illustrated: The Life and Art of Alex Toth, by Dean Mullaney and Bruce Canwell (LOAC/IDW) 
  • The Love and Rockets Companion, edited by Marc Sobel and Kristy Valenti (Fantagraphics)

Best Scholarly/Academic Work

  • Anti-Foreign Imagery in American Pulps and Comic Books, 1920–1960, by Nathan Vernon Madison (McFarland)
  • Black Comics: Politics of Race and Representation, edited by Sheena C. Howard and Ronald L. Jackson II (Bloomsbury) 
  • Drawing from Life: Memory and Subjectivity in Comic Art, edited by Jane Tolmie (University Press of Mississippi) 
  • International Journal of Comic Art, edited by John A. Lent
  • The Superhero Reader, edited by Charles Hatfield, Jeet Heer, and Ken Worcester (University Press of Mississippi)

Best Publication Design

  • The Art of Rube Goldberg, designed by Chad W. Beckerman (Abrams ComicArts) 
  • Beta Testing the Apocalypse, designed by Tom Kaczynski (Fantagraphics) 
  • Genius, Illustrated: The Life and Art of Alex Toth, designed by Dean Mullaney (LOAC/IDW) 
  • The Great War: July 1, 1916: The First Day of the Battle of the Somme: A Panorama, by Joe Sacco, designed by Chin-Yee Lai (Norton) 
  • Little Tommy Lost, Book 1, designed by Cole Closser (Koyama)




The Outhouse is sponsored this week by Late Nite Draw. Recently featured on ComicsAlliances' Best Art Ever, he is a Chicago-based commissioned artist with a self-published Digital+Print one-shot coming out in October about the abominable snowman called ABOBAMANIMABBLE, and is also available for commissions. Check out some amazing art by clicking here or by clicking the banner at the top, and support the people who support The Outhouse.


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About the Author - Jude Terror


Jude Terror is the Webmaster Supreme of The Outhouse and a sarcastic ace reporter dedicated to delivering irreverent comics and entertainment news to The Outhouse's dozens of loyal readers. Driven by a quest for vengeance, Jude Terror taught himself to program and joined The Outhouse. He instantly began working toward his goal of forcing the internet comics community to take itself less seriously and failing miserably.  Ironically, our webmaster, whose website skills know no end, has very little understanding of social networks or how they work.  Regardless, you can find him on Twitter, Facebook, and Tumblr, but would probably have the most luck just emailing him.

 


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