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HBO to Compete With Lullabies and Ambien, Adapting J.K. Rowling's Casual Vacancy

HBO to Compete With Lullabies and Ambien, Adapting J.K. Rowling's Casual Vacancy

The premium cable network aims to conquer the sleep aid market with an adaptation of the incredibly boring book.



Source: Bleeding Cool

Linda Ge must be really hopped up on crystal meth, because the Bleeding Cool reporter managed to get through three entire paragraphs of an article about HBO's adaptation of The Casual Vacancy without falling into a deep coma. The book from Harry Potter scribe J.K. Rowling, which has nothing at all to do with wizards or magic, is set in the West Country, widely regarded as the most boring part of Britain, and tells the story of... well shit, we've written about this multiple times before, but we still have no fucking idea. Here's a short summary from WIkipedia:

The novel is set in a suburban West Country town called Pagford and begins with the death of beloved Parish Councillor Barry Fairbrother. Subsequently, a seat on the council is vacant and a conflict ensues before the election for his successor takes place. Factions develop, particularly concerning whether to dissociate with a local council estate, "the Fields", with which Barry supported an alliance. However, those running for a place soon find their darkest secrets revealed on the Parish Council online forum, ruining their campaign and leaving the election in turmoil.

 

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ woowoowoowoowoowoowoowoowoo.

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ woowoowoowoowoowoowoowoowoo.

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ woowoowoowoowoowoowoowoowoo.

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ woowoowoowoowoowoowoowoowoo.

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ woowoowoowoowoowoowoowoowoo.

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ woowoowoowoowoowoowoowoowoo.

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ woowoowoowoowoowoowoowoowoo.

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ woowoowoowoowoowoowoowoo*SNORT*

Wha? Huh?! Jesus Christ! It's one in the afternoon! I started writing this article at 9AM!

Wow, sorry about that folks. It is impossible to stay awake while reading even a summary of The Casual Vacancy, which we have to assume is the reason HBO is adapting it. While the company has been reluctant to leave the confines of the cable TV subscription model, they've said nothing about not wanting to compete in the pharmaceutical sleep aid market. If you're tired of taking sleeping pills, chugging NyQuil by the bottle, or jerking off to Brett Booth comics to fall asleep at night, it looks like you've got an extremely viable new option on the table.

The three episode mini-series is adapted by Sarah Phelps and will be directed by Morpheus, the Lord of Dreams Jonny Campbell. Doctors advise viewers not to watch The Casual Vacancy more than four times in twenty-four hours. Consult your physician if symptoms persist for more than two weeks. Side effects include extreme boredom, narcolepsy, and a desire to write Ginny Weasley fan fiction.





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About the Author - Jude Terror


Jude Terror is the Webmaster Supreme of The Outhouse and a sarcastic ace reporter dedicated to delivering irreverent comics and entertainment news to The Outhouse's dozens of loyal readers. Driven by a quest for vengeance, Jude Terror taught himself to program and joined The Outhouse. He instantly began working toward his goal of forcing the internet comics community to take itself less seriously and failing miserably.  Ironically, our webmaster, whose website skills know no end, has very little understanding of social networks or how they work.  Regardless, you can find him on Twitter, Facebook, and Tumblr, but would probably have the most luck just emailing him.

 


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