Face it, you're old. The eighties? That shit was, like, thirty years ago. The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles just celebrated their thirtieth anniversary. That's twice the age of an actual teenage mutant ninja turtle! Though you may still be reading basically the same stories featuring the same characters in the same comic book titles you were thirty years ago, deep down, you know that you're going to die soon. Maybe not today. Maybe not tomorrow. Maybe not in the next ten years. But in another thirty? Chances are, overweight, inactive, and unhealthy as you are, you're going to be dead.
So why not use the time you have left to bring back one of the joys of your own childhood and help give a new generation of kids something to be nostalgic for when they're fat and lazy and closer to death than they are to childhood by contributing to LeVar Burton's Kickstarter campaign to bring back Reading Rainbow, the seminal children's television program aimed at teaching kids how to read. Burton is looking to raise...
...ONE MILLION DOLLARS to bring the show back as a web program and to distribute it for free to needy schools. You know, again. Because we're pretty sure he just brought it back a few years ago, and it was only 2006 when the first run actually ended. But that's not the point. The point is, you might not be around in thirty years, but with your help, Reading Rainbow can be.
Now that we've got you in the proper mood, here's the cheery message from LeVar Burton:
Hi. LeVar Burton here. You may know me as Kunta Kinte, from ROOTS, or Geordi La Forge, from Star Trek: The Next Generation.
You also may have grown up with me on Reading Rainbow.
It was my mother who taught me that, by picking up a book, I could "go anywhere" and "be anything." Ever since Reading Rainbow began in 1983, I have dedicated myself to fostering a love of reading in children, just as my mother did for me.
Over the past year, I have watched Kickstarter bring communities together to support artists and inventors. Again and again, I have been inspired by watching like-minded people team up to accomplish impossible dreams, and to change the world.
Now, I am hoping you will join me on my mission: to bring Reading Rainbow back for every child, everywhere.
Head over to the Kickstarter page to pledge. Rewards include a LeVar Burton autograph, a skype chat with LeVar Burton, a picnic with LeVar Burton, a private dinner with LeVar Burton, and LeVar Burton making sweet, sweet love to you on top of a pile of children's books.