¡Hola comrades! Juan Cena here with another edition of Cubano Review. El Presidente is locked up in the kitchen right now working on dishes for his new vegan diet. He tells me that going vegan is more economical and better for The Revolution. To be honest I don’t quite believe him about going vegan being economical. Have you seen the prices of vegan meat lately? You could eat Fogo de Chao for a week with what price of a good side of vegan sirloin goes for now.
But I digress. You came here for movie news, well I’ve got it! The evil and creatively bankrupt Hollywood capitalists are once again rebooting yet another beloved franchise from your younger days. This time, MGM and Time-Warner are teaming up to reboot Stargate, one of the most racist films ever made that got turned into a television franchise.
The original film’s creators,
film disaster disaster film specialist Roland Emmerich and producer Dean Devlin, have been tapped to develop a new film trilogy based on their 1994 film about some white people who travel to another world through an ancient stargate uncovered in Egypt. The film starred James Spader as the white “Egyptologist” who thinks ancient Egyptians were too dumb to build pyramids, Kurt Russell as the US Air Force colonel that Richard Dean Anderson played in the subsequent Stargate SG-1 TV series, as Jaye Davidson (The Crying Game) as Ra the pyramid-building space alien.
The film trilogy is in the development stage, so there is no release date or film casting set. Emmerich is set to return as director. He and Devlin are currently working on the sequel to their 1996 film Independence Day, so it might be a while before the first of the new Stargate films comes to light.
As for Stargate being racist, allow me to explain, comrades. The original Stargate was centered on the idea that the Egyptians culture was influenced by space aliens who came to Earth and either helped build the pyramids or just went ahead and built them for the Egyptians. The rationalization behind this is the idea that the Egyptians were far too primitive, far-too European, and far-too non-white to have built their civilization on their own.
The whole idea is bunk, of course. It hasn’t stopped a small cottage industry of greedy capitalists spreading their racist ideas, ranging from the “classic” Chariots of the Gods to the Ancient Aliens TV series to the mindless drivel heard constantly on the Coast to Coast AM radio program. All of which claim non-European cultures like the Egyptians and Mayans were just too “primitive” to have built their ancient kingdoms by themselves.
Meanwhile, they all but avoid suggesting that the Greeks or the Romans, the backbones of Western European civilization, had any extraterrestrial help in building architectural masterpieces like the Parthenon or the Colosseum, even though they are both far more architecturally complex that any Egyptian or Mayan pyramid.
If you want a good source on this, check out the Ancient Aliens Debunked documentary produced by Chris White. It’s over three hours long, but parts of it have been cut into digest form on various places on YouTube. The part of the documentary dealing with the Egyptian pyramids is right here.
The Outhouse is sponsored by Cinema Crazed: Celebrating Film Culture & Pop Culture.
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