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What Will REALLY Happen to Wolverine and the X-Men When Wolverine Dies?

Written by Jude Terror on Wednesday, June 25 2014 and posted in News with Benefits

What Will REALLY Happen to Wolverine and the X-Men When Wolverine Dies?

How will the popular title continue without its titular character?!

Source: Anonymous Tip on Our Forums

With Marvel's upcoming September blockbuster world-changing event comic The Death of Wolverine making permanent changes to the Marvel universe that could last as long as several weeks before he comes back to life, readers have been wondering what will happen to all the books starring Wolverine, which make up about 60% of Marvel's monthly output. Bleeding Cool rumormonger Rich Johnston took a stab at this rumor like it was one of Wolverine's children this morning when he claimed to have the answer for one of the books: Wolverine and the X-Men:

I’ve been told that as well as a number of Fallen Son-style tie-in titles to follow The Death Of Wolverine, that the Wolverine & The X-Men comic will follow a similar pattern to the DC title Batman And Robin after Robin died.

And the first arc will be called Spider-Man & The X-Men, as Wolverine leaves the headmastership of the school to the rather non-mutant Peter Parker…..


Johnston also said the regular Wolverine title will cease publishing while Wolverine is temporarily dead. But according to The Outhouse's sources, otherwise known as one of our message board commenters, Johnston is wrong. Dead wrong. Like really dead wrong, not dead but gonna come back with a new number one issue reboot and seventeen weapon-etched holofoil variant covers wrong.

What we're hearing is that Wolverine and the X-Men will actually merge with the regular Wolverine title to become a new weekly series called Weekend at Wolverine's, penciled by Mahmud Asrar and written by Paul Cornell while Jason Aaron peers creepily at them through a window. The premise is simple: two of Wolverine's illegitimate children, who look remarkably like a young Andrew McCarthy and Jonathan Silverman, discover Wolverine's corpse after he's been killed. Learning that Wolverine had planned to stab them repeatedly with his claws because that's what he does to his offspring, the two men decide to pretend that Wolverine is alive so that they can exploit his status as the moral center of the Marvel universe. Hilarity ensues as the pair gets themselves into increasingly more ridiculous situations where they need to prop the deceased, surly mutant up and pretend he's alive, which is made more difficult by the fact that he has 200 pounds of adamantium bound to his skeleton, yet, at the same time, made easier by the fact that the smell of his decomposing flesh isn't too much worse than his usual odor.

"We said we were going to kill Wolverine," said Marvel Editor in Chief Axel Alonso when we confronted him about Weekend at Wolverine's. "We didn't say we were going to stop publishing books starring him. A dead Wolverine will still sell more books than 90% of our other titles."

"In fact," Alonso mused, "we're actually thinking of adding a deceased Logan to even more titles. It would be a shame not to capitalize on all the attention his death will be getting."

The series will be published weekly, except on weeks when it double ships, and retail for a new price point of $5.99. Look for the series to launch in October, following the conclusion of Death of Wolverine in September. Then look for it to be canceled and replaced by the regular Wolverine titles when Wolverine comes back to life in mid-October. Stay tuned to The Outhouse for details.


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About the Author - Jude Terror

Jude Terror is the Webmaster Supreme of The Outhouse and a sarcastic ace reporter dedicated to delivering irreverent comics and entertainment news to The Outhouse's dozens of loyal readers. Driven by a quest for vengeance, Jude Terror taught himself to program and joined The Outhouse. He instantly began working toward his goal of forcing the internet comics community to take itself less seriously and failing miserably. A certified trash eater ruining the pristine field of comics journalism with his sarcasm and goofiness, Jude Terror is secretly friendly and congenial, so if you've got a complaint, why not just bring it up to him instead of subtweeting like a jackass, jackass? You can find him on Twitter or try your luck with an email, but keep in mind that he is notoriously unreliable and may not get back to you right away. Unless you want to send him free stuff, in which case he'll get back to you immediately.

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