In a press release yesterday, sixth or seventh place premium cable network Starz announced "script to series" development of a TV adaptation of American Gods, the 2001 novel by Neil Gaiman, the favorite writer of everyone who doesn't normally read books without pictures. Bryan Fuller (“Hannibal,” “Pushing Daisies,” “Heroes”) and Michael Green (“The River,” “Kings,” “Heroes”) will write the pilot and serve as showrunners.
In a particularly long-winded statement, even for him, Gaiman said of the series:
When you create something like ‘American Gods,’ which attracts fans and obsessives and people who tattoo quotes from it on themselves or each other, and who all, tattooed or not, just care about it deeply, it's really important to pick your team carefully: you don't want to let the fans down, or the people who care and have been casting it online since the dawn of recorded history. What I love most about the team who I trust to take it out to the world, is that they are the same kind of fanatics that ’American Gods’ has attracted since the start. I haven't actually checked Bryan Fuller or Michael Green for quote tattoos, but I would not be surprised if they have them. The people at Fremantle are the kinds of people who have copies of ‘American Gods in the bottom of their backpacks after going around the world, and who press them on their friends. And the team at Starz have been quite certain that they wanted to give Shadow, Wednesday and Laura a home since they first heard that the book was out there.I can't wait to see what they do to bring the story to the widest possible audience able to cope with it.
Gaiman then went on to describe in great detail the sexual practices of he and his wife, Dresden Dolls frontwoman and fellow weirdo Amanda Palmer, with whom he has an open relationship. Gaiman rambled about Fuller and Green's tattoos some more, and then offered to allow the producers to throw paint on his nude wife during a live art performance sometime in the future. Really, it was all pretty inappropriate for a press release.
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In return for the compliments, Fuller sang an epic heavy metal anthem to Gaiman backed by legendary 80s rockers Manowar.
"Neil Gaiman has created the holiest of holy toy boxes with ‘American Gods’ and filled it with all manner of magical thing, born of new gods and old," screeched Fuller, dressed in a loincloth and spiked shoulder pads. "Michael Green and I are thrilled to crack this toy box wide open and unleash the fantastical titans of heaven and earth and Neil's vividly prolific imagina-shuuuuuunnnn!"
"Huwaaah!" Fuller added, clenching his fist dramatically as guitarist Ross "The Boss" Friedman launched into a bitchin' guitar solo.
There was also a bunch of other crap about executive producers and production companies you've never heard of, and if you care about that kind of stuff, you're probably reading the wrong website. We'll keep you updated when they announce an air date or the casting begins.