So as it turns out, George R. R. Martin is none too pleased with all the people who speculate that he's going to die before finishing his popular A Song of Ice and Fire novels because he's too old and too fat. I know, it's very shocking. Martin addressed his critics in an interview with Swiss newspaper Tagesanzeiger (gezundheit!), saying, "I find that question pretty offensive, frankly, when people start speculating about my death and my health. So fuck you to those people."
Martin, posed for some reason in front of a blackboard declaring "NIFFF" over and over, explained that he has no intentions of changing the way he writes, which is to lock himself in a sensory deprivation chamber so he can imagine 50 pages worth of descriptive text about what characters are having for brunch (toast prepared in the french style, dripping with syrup of maple and heaped with blueberries, a flagon of mimosa, fresh grapefruit sliced down the middle, exposing its blood red pulp... shit, now we're hungry) :
I don’t know what I can do about it—I can’t write many more than one word at a time. I’m 65 years old now; I’ve been writing professionally since 1971. I know my working methods. I don’t work when I travel, I don’t work in hotels, I don’t work on airplanes, I don’t work on trains.
He will not write it in a house. He will not write it with a mouse. He would not, could not, in a tree. Not in a car, you let him be!
Ok, where will he write it then?
I work at home, when I have a nice, big uninterrupted block of time in which I can really lose myself in my work. And it’s worked for me for my entire adult life. I’m not going to change it now because some people are too impatient to wait for the next book.
So it looks like we're just going to have to deal with the fact that Martin doesn't intend to release the final Game of Thrones book until 2044, when he's 95 year old. And if you don't like it, George R. R. Martin has a message for you:
Well said, George. Well said.