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DC Employees Shocked to Discover They Have to Work on Batman Day

Written by ThanosCopter on Wednesday, July 23 2014 and posted in News with Benefits

DC Employees Shocked to Discover They Have to Work on Batman Day

DC employees were surprised to learn they were expected to work during the federal holiday.

Source: ThanosCopter Newswire

DC Comics employees were forced to put their planned Batman Day celebrations on hold when the comics publisher announced they expected their employees to treat the holiday like a normal work day.  Despite heavily promoting Batman Day for weeks and both the federal government and banks shutting down for the day, employees were informed via email that they could not use the holiday as an excuse to take the day off work.

"I was devastated to learn that DC expects me to work on Batman Day, the most sacred of all superhero-themed holidays," one employee told the Outhouse.  

DC employees were forced to postpone or cancel holiday plans, which included assaulting the mentally ill, dropping relatives down wells in order to force them to get back up, and staging their murders in order to inspire their children to take up a life of crimefighting.  "I spent a lot of good money filling my house with thousands of bats," complained one employee.  "And now I'm just expected to go into work and miss my family being traumatized for life?  What sort of company do they think this is?"

Several employees were considering filing a lawsuit against DC, claiming that the company was infringing upon their religious rights by not allowing them to take the holiday off.  Others planned to dangle DC executive Dan Didio from a rooftop until he called off the mandate. One even considered dressing up as the Joker as a form of protest, but were afraid of being confused with DC editor in chief Bob Harras, and found other ways to protest.  "I'm just going to hide in the corner of the bathroom all day and brood," said the employee.  "If anyone asks, I'll just pretend they're not there."

However, not everyone sees working through the holiday as a bad thing.  "I plan on spending today coming up with fantastic comic ideas with my co-workers," said one unnamed DC creator.  "And then getting DC to sign contracts that credits me as the sole creator so I can rake in the royalties while they're left out in the cold.  To me, that's the greatest Batman Day celebration of all."


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About the Author - ThanosCopter

ThanosCopter is a specially designed helicopter built to transport Thanos the Mad Titan. Built by Sterling Custom Helicopters, ThanosCopter appeared in several Marvel comics, before being abandoned by its owner during the character's ascension into major villainy. ThanosCopter was discovered by the Outhouse and given a second chance at life. He now buzzes merrily around the comic book industry, spreading snark, satire and humor like candy to small children.


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