Wednesday, December 19, 2018 • Morning Edition • "The comic book industry's inflamed butthole."

Bronies Rejoice! My Little Pony Feature Film Coming to Theaters in 2017!

Written by El Presidente on Tuesday, October 21 2014 and posted in News with Benefits

Bronies Rejoice! My Little Pony Feature Film Coming to Theaters in 2017!

The movie will be join Jem and the Holograms at Hasbro's Allspark Pictures.

Source: Variety

Greetings, comrades! It is I, your El Presidente, reporting to you live from a Liberian Airlines flight into the United States. President Obama will never look for me here! Haw haw haw!

My friends, I have got some great news for you. Hasbro's new movie studio Allspark Pictures plans to produce a My Little Pony animated feature film for release in 2017! This scoop comes by way of Variety, so I will be sure to cough in an envelope and mail it to their offices. According to their report, the script will be written by Joe Ballarini and executive produced by Megan McCarthy, who has written for both the My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic series and the grown-up pony soft-core porn flick Equestria Girls.

I'm very excited about this news because I am a huge brony. I mean, what's not to love about a group of magical ponies living in an egalitarian socialist paradise where class structures and disparities of utility are overcome purely through the power of friendship. I mean, sure, there are a few too many royal princesses for my liking, and the ponies could stand to do away with their colorful "cutie marks" and dye their fur olive drab, but all in all, there are a lot of similarities between Equestria and my homeland of Cuba. My little buddy Che Guevara was also a huge brony before he was captured and put to death by the Bolvian Army, notorious for being hardcore Strawberry Shortcake fans.

Comrades, it's not clear from Variety's report whether the film will be set in the Friendship is Magic universe, but hopefully it will be, because the last thing I want to have to do is rework my Pinkie Pie costume for opening night. Stay tuned to Cubano Review, your number one source for Hollywood gossip and pony news, as well as The Outhouse, for updates on this upcoming cinematic masterpiece.


Help spread the word, loyal readers! Share this story on social media:

Comment without an Outhouse Account using Facebook

We get it. You don't feel like signing up for an Outhouse account, even though it's FREE and EASY! That's okay. You can comment with your Facebook account below and we'll take care of adding it to the stream above. But you really should consider getting a full Outhouse account, which will allow you to quote posts, choose an avatar and sig, and comment on our forums too. If that sounds good to you, sign up for an Outhouse account by clicking here.

Note: while you are welcome to speak your mind freely on any topic, we do ask that you keep discussion civil between each other. Nasty personal attacks against other commenters is strongly discouraged. Thanks!
Help spread the word, loyal readers! Share this story on social media:

About the Author - El Presidente

El Presidente gave up his position as President and Prime Minister of Cuba, as well as First Secretary of Cuba's Communist Party, in 2008 in order to concentrate on his true love: Hollywood gossip reporting. Forming the rumor website Cubano Review, El Presidente built a name for himself based on over THREE DOZEN industry credited trade scoops. Unfortunately, capitalist American trade embargoes have rendered unreachable from within the United States, forcing El Presidente to syndicate his articles to The Outhouse, which flies under the radar of the American oligarchy thanks to most leaders assuming it is a scat porn site, which, to be fair, is basically true.


More articles from El Presidente
The Outhouse is not responsible for any butthurt incurred by reading this website. All original content copyright the author. Banner by Ali Jaffery - he's available for commission!