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BREAKING: Armed Patriots Led by Dennis Barger Jr. Occupy Burbank Krispy Kreme in Protest of DC #Rebirth

Written by Jude Terror on Monday, February 22 2016 and posted in News with Benefits

BREAKING: Armed Patriots Led by Dennis Barger Jr. Occupy Burbank Krispy Kreme in Protest of DC #Rebirth

The group plans to hold out as long as it takes to force DC Comics to capitulate to their demands.

Source: Bleeding Cool

The backlash against DC Comics' upcoming #Rebirth reboot event hit a new level today when a group of heavily armed protestors led by controversial retailer Dennis Barger Jr. stormed the Burbank Krispy Kreme Donuts location and refused to leave until the publisher gives into a list of demands. Rebirth was announced at last week's ComicsPRO, an event geared toward comics retailers in the direct market, and featured DC Co-Publisher Dan Didio vying for the affections of local comic shop owners with ideas like reimbursing the retailers for all advertising costs. However, Barger and his group believe that DC hasn't gone far enough in appeasing retailers and listed steps the company could take to regain their trust.

"Since most of us were never consulted and now Dan Didio claims he's putting retailers first on this project I thought we should take over a local donut shop and tell Dan what we would like to see before we are won over on this," Barger told reporters from local news stations in between large bites from several chocolate iced custard filled donuts. "My first demand is a 4 week roll back on Day and Date Digital. Show us that's we're first but putting us first and exclusive for 28 days. If not then you aren't putting us first."

As Barger switched to lemon filled glazed donuts, he continued his demands, telling reporters as they dodged the crumbs flying from his mouth, "Second demand, free preview for FCBD matching our other DC FCBD title FOC orders. Third demand- 8 week delayed billing and fully returnable with no processing fee after 4 weeks. Fourth demand, guaranteed original page count now, before we go forward."

Barger, who is calling his group of patriots "Retailers Not Buying In Big For DC Rebirth," said that he will not relinquish control of the Krispy Kreme until all of his demands are met, or until the facility's frozen coffee machine runs out of mocha syrup - "whichever comes first." At press time, DC had not responded to the demands, but several editors were heard complaining about the office break room's shortage of maple twists. We'll keep you updated, but if you're interested in joining the group or sending supplies to the patriots, you can visit their Facebook page here.


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About the Author - Jude Terror

Jude Terror is the Webmaster Supreme of The Outhouse and a sarcastic ace reporter dedicated to delivering irreverent comics and entertainment news to The Outhouse's dozens of loyal readers. Driven by a quest for vengeance, Jude Terror taught himself to program and joined The Outhouse. He instantly began working toward his goal of forcing the internet comics community to take itself less seriously and failing miserably. A certified trash eater ruining the pristine field of comics journalism with his sarcasm and goofiness, Jude Terror is secretly friendly and congenial, so if you've got a complaint, why not just bring it up to him instead of subtweeting like a jackass, jackass? You can find him on Twitter or try your luck with an email, but keep in mind that he is notoriously unreliable and may not get back to you right away. Unless you want to send him free stuff, in which case he'll get back to you immediately.

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