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Alan Moore Vows to Color Watchmen Coloring Book With Blood of Enemies

Written by Jude Terror on Thursday, February 25 2016 and posted in News with Benefits

Alan Moore Vows to Color Watchmen Coloring Book With Blood of Enemies

DC Comics' plans to release a Watchmen coloring book are just the latest in a long line of insults that Moore can no longer bear.

Source: Bleeding Cool

Citing "long overdue comeuppance" and "an unquenchable thirst for vengeance," legendary comics creator Alan Moore today told close associates that he plans to purchase a copy of DC Comics' upcoming Watchmen coloring book and color the entire thing with "the crimson lifeblood of my enemies."


Moore, who created Watchmen with artist Dave Gibbons in 1986, signed a contract with the publisher stating that the rights would return to him once the book went out of print. However, in a move that was unprecedented at the time, DC Comics essentially created the entire back catalog trade paperback system solely to ensure that the book remained in print eternally and Moore would never get the rights back. Since that time, DC has repeatedly thumbed its nose at Moore, first turning Watchmen into a major motion picture directed by Zack Snyder, then producing toasters branded with the Watchmen logo that burned Rorshach's face into pieces of bread, and finally producing a series of cash-grab sequel comics called Before Watchmen, even enticing the traitorous Len Wein to participate. The coloring book is just the latest in a long line of business moves that Moore views as personal slights, and the 62 year old scribe isn't going to take it anymore.

"Too long have those rapscallions dragged my creations through filth in the name of profit," said Moore as he sharpened a quill to a razor-fine point and brandished it menacingly. "I shall have my revenge."

Asked for comment, DC Co-Publisher Dan Didio scoffed, "Come on, Al. It's been thirty years. Get over it." Didio mused that Watchmen was overdue for a reboot anyway, and that he needed to remind himself to ask Jim Lee to redesign the characters. "How do you get a high collar on a naked blue guy," Didio wondered, drifting off into thought.

At press time, Moore was reportedly holding several DC interns hostage in the dungeon of his Northampton castle, and said he planned to record their torture in a 2,000 page script for his next graphic novel, to be interwoven with scenes of a Batman analogue ejaculating onto a pile of money. The comic will be published by Avatar Press, and lauded by Bleeding Cool as the greatest work of the 21st century. We'll keep you updated.



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About the Author - Jude Terror

Jude Terror is the Webmaster Supreme of The Outhouse and a sarcastic ace reporter dedicated to delivering irreverent comics and entertainment news to The Outhouse's dozens of loyal readers. Driven by a quest for vengeance, Jude Terror taught himself to program and joined The Outhouse. He instantly began working toward his goal of forcing the internet comics community to take itself less seriously and failing miserably. A certified trash eater ruining the pristine field of comics journalism with his sarcasm and goofiness, Jude Terror is secretly friendly and congenial, so if you've got a complaint, why not just bring it up to him instead of subtweeting like a jackass, jackass? You can find him on Twitter or try your luck with an email, but keep in mind that he is notoriously unreliable and may not get back to you right away. Unless you want to send him free stuff, in which case he'll get back to you immediately.

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