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REPORT: Lack of Diversity in DC #Rebirth Announcements Direct Result of March Madness Tournament

Written by Jude Terror on Monday, March 28 2016 and posted in News with Benefits

REPORT: Lack of Diversity in DC #Rebirth Announcements Direct Result of March Madness Tournament

DC Rebirth: It's everything you love about New 52... minus Gail Simone.

Source: Wondercon Rebirth Announcements

With DC Comics' big #Rebirth press conference finally behind us, the world can stop wondering what the comics publisher has in store for its big line-wide publishing initiative. The answer: pretty much more of the same. And that answer doesn't just refer to the continuation of the Nu52 continuity or the general reshuffling of the company's existing creative talent onto pretty much the same books they were publishing before the event, or to the continued reign of incompetence led by Diane Nelson, Dan Didio, Jim Lee, Geoff Johns, and Bob Harras. In terms of diversity, DC appears to have opted for a more subtle approach, and by subtle, we mean... well, let's let Comics Alliance sum it up:

Only four women writers were announced on a total of three books between them; Batgirl, Batgirl and the Birds of Prey, and Harley Quinn. Two of DC's biggest female heroes, Supergirl and Wonder Woman, are in the hands of male writers, as is the new Superwoman title, while no women writers have been named to titles led by male characters.

The number of writers of color is down, with Yang and Manapul joined by Christopher Priest and John Semper, but David F. Walker, Amy Chu and Ming Doyle all absent. The lack of titles for Midnighter and Catwoman leaves Harley Quinn and John Constantine as the only LGBTQ solo leads.


Also missing from DC's lineup is Marguerite Bennett, originally rumored to be writing Wonder Woman but seemingly replaced by a returning Greg Rucka, and Gail Simone, who was not announced as writing a single book in the #Rebirth lineup. Of course, it's always possible that, just like with All-New All-Different Marvel, DC is simply waiting to announce its "diverse" titles later, for reasons, but the reshuffling of priorities visible in the current announcements does seem to match up with recent statements from the company about "meat and potatoes" and "no Batgirling," as well as a coded message from Geoff Johns that the company would be returning to its focus on "fans who've read a lot of comics." For readers hoping DC would up the ante on diversity, the results must seem like a purposeful letdown, but in fact, The Outhouse has learned that it's actually purely an oversight brought about by the inability of leader Dan Didio to stay focused on his job.

"You know, I totally meant to hire Gail Simone to write one of these books," remarked DC Co-Publisher Dan Didio. "But I was so caught up in the NCAA March Madness tournament, it just slipped my mind. To be honest, I've really dropped the ball on a lot of this, but I just can't stop thinking about finally beating that god damned kid."

It seems outrageous, but evidence does seem to indicate that DC's lack of commitment to diversity is wholly the result of an office betting pool. According to reports, Didio, a rabid basketball fan, has lost the contest every single year since 2012 to hardworking intern Vlad Kozinkerov, despite the intern not following the sport and only filling out the brackets to be be involved in the social camaraderie that comes with participating in the annual event.

"They tell me, Vlad, fill out these brackets, so that is what I do," Kozinkerov told The Outhouse. "It turns out, I am very lucky at choosing winners in strange American hand-soccer game."

Kozinkerov explained that he is grateful for his past victories in the contest, as it has allowed him to send the winnings back to Russia where it pays for his sister's annual life-saving surgery. However, Kozinkerov admitted that he does "feel bad for Mr. Didio, who seems to get very upset when he does not win. This year, I choose Villanova, Oklahoma, North Carolina, and Syracuse for Final Four, purely at random, because I figure they are unlikely to win and Mr. Didio can finally be happy. Of course, my sister will probably die and her nine children will be sent to Siberian ice mines as wards of state, but is small price to pay to boost Mr. Didio's self confidence."

Unfortunately, by sheer coincidence, those exact teams are the ones who made it to the Final Four, leading Kozinkerov and Didio into yet another showdown for the betting pool leading up to April 4th's championship game. But more importantly, its caused the executive to lose focus, allowing his comics line to become whiter and maler during a time when most entertainment companies are pushing to be more inclusive in their output.

"Look, as soon as I finally win this thing this year, I promise, I'm going to fix this," Didio swore while anxiously analyzing stats from recent basketball games, looking over his brackets, and frowning diligently.

At press time, a company-wide meeting to address the lack of diversity in the #Rebirth lineup was postponed indefinitely so employees could prepare for the office Fantasy Baseball draft. We'll keep you updated.


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About the Author - Jude Terror

Jude Terror is the Webmaster Supreme of The Outhouse and a sarcastic ace reporter dedicated to delivering irreverent comics and entertainment news to The Outhouse's dozens of loyal readers. Driven by a quest for vengeance, Jude Terror taught himself to program and joined The Outhouse. He instantly began working toward his goal of forcing the internet comics community to take itself less seriously and failing miserably. A certified trash eater ruining the pristine field of comics journalism with his sarcasm and goofiness, Jude Terror is secretly friendly and congenial, so if you've got a complaint, why not just bring it up to him instead of subtweeting like a jackass, jackass? You can find him on Twitter or try your luck with an email, but keep in mind that he is notoriously unreliable and may not get back to you right away. Unless you want to send him free stuff, in which case he'll get back to you immediately.

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