It's been a rough couple of days for Democratic presidential hopeful Hillary Clinton since the Inspector General released a report saying Clinton failed to ask permission to use a private email server or inform key staff in the State Department about her plans, adding new fuel to the fire of a scandal that's plagued the campaign for the entire race. But that wasn't even the worst thing to happen to the presumptive Democratic nominee on Wednesday. That was also the day that Captain America: Steve Rogers #1 was released to comic book shops, revealing that Steve Rogers has been a Hydra agent since childhood. As a result of the controversial twist, writer Nick Spencer has been dedicating his online time to defending against complaints of anti-semitism and transparent stunt-writing instead of devoting 24 hours a day to obsessively tweeting about Hillary Clinton and her destiny to be the next president of the United States.
"The campaign isn't too concerned about the fact that Captain America is a Nazi now," sources told The Outhouse. "What's really got them worried is that Spencer's nonstop tweeting about Hillary was a cornerstone of their social media strategy, and they're struggling to fill the void Spencer left behind."
Indeed, in the days since Captain America: Steve Rogers #1 was released, Spencer has been tweeting things like, "It's true! You can always read SAM WILSON: CAPTAIN AMERICA instead. That'll teach me," and "By this definition, every story you have ever read is a gimmick," and "Oh god what have I done?!" rather than firing out a literally non-stop barrage of pro-Clinton tweets such as "One doesn't know how to use email, the other wants nuclear proliferation and a trade war. Yes, similar risk level," and "These views, after all, are not coming out of thin air. A couple years ago, Clinton had highest favorables going. Media tear-down brutal," and "Sanders campaign is somehow even bro-ier than Trump's. So many women to scold." The lack of Clinton-related tweets is the biggest in the author's social media profile since that time Spencer took a two and a half hour nap back in March.
The change has resulted in confusion amongst Spencer's Twitter followers, who are as baffled by the sudden lack of relentless political tweeting from the alleged comic book writer. Their concern is understandable when one considers that Spencer's love of Hillary Clinton has been expressed over a corpus of Tweets as extensive as the publishing catalog of Captain America comics itself. Spencer not tweeting about Clinton is as shocking a change as a 75-year-old superhero created by two Jewish comic book creators to fight Naziism out of the blue becoming a lifelong Nazi. Who could have ever seen either of those things coming?!
And yet, that's what has happened, and with Clinton looking to pivot into the general election, Spencer's reduced output couldn't have come at a worse time. Political analysts say Spencer filled several vital roles in the campaign effort, and his loss could set off a chain reaction of undesirable outcomes for Clinton. Without Spencer to argue with Bernie Bros with every waking moment of his life, how will Democratic rival Bernie Sanders know that he should drop out of the race and let Hillary unite the party to defeat Donald Trump? Without Spencer to defend Hillary against every Clinton family scandal of the past twenty-five years, how can the campaign hope to boost her favorability ratings before the election? Who will combat the Hitler-esque Rogers-esque cult of personality of Trump if not the one man with the tenacity, endurance, and possible mental illness to tweet literally hundreds of a times a day, day after day, month after month, throughout the entire election cycle, about politics on a Twitter account followed mostly by comic book nerds?
It's a question for which the Clinton camp has no answers, but they're going to need to figure something out with the looming California primary on June 7. Will Spencer be able to move past his temporary interest in comics-related social media talk and get back to the business of telling anyone who will listen, as often as they're willing to listen, and oh god, long after they've stopped wanting to hear anything about it, please just stop, we've heard enough, Spencer, we've heard enough, that Hillary Clinton is without a doubt the best possible candidate to defeat Donald Trump in the general election? The Clinton campaign hopes so, but in this unpredictable election cycle, anything is possible.
For example, Captain America is the Republican nominee, and Donald Trump is a... wait, sorry, we got them confused again. Donald Trump is the Republican nominee, and Captain America is a Nazi. And Nick Spencer hasn't tweeted about Hillary Clinton in more than a week. These are strange days we live in.