Tuesday, August 14, 2018 • Morning Edition • "*the sound you hear when PAC-MAN dies*"

The Super Article For Super Bowl 51 Commercials!

Written by Zechs on Monday, February 06 2017 and posted in News with Benefits

The Super Article For Super Bowl 51 Commercials!

Instead of numerous click-baiting articles like other sites (PIP! PIP! YOU TRAITOR!!), we're just gonna put all the movie commercials in just ONE article, which makes it all the more clickable. SO CLICK AWAY!!



IT RETURNS!!! 

Unlike OTHER sites that have TREACHEROUS former employees spreading content across thinly on their main page. We here at the Outhousers believe in one article. For your all your catering needs. For starters, we have my personal favorite that's coming THIS FRIDAY, John Wick: Chapter 2.

 

You just gotta love the sick burn they had for 50 Shades of Grey or whatever the hell the sequel is calling itself. Next up is our #2 Logan, which continues its trailer dominance 

 

In the TRAITOR category of films. You have this spot for the Fate of the Furious. Which deals with a once close-knit group of friends who's lives are turned upside down when one goes TRAITOR to a rival. 

Yep, that's totally a factual account of Jude Terrror betraying this website. Would that make me Roman Pierce? Eh, I can buy that. 

Then you have the usual stand-bys with Marvel, and this year we have Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 and-- huh no Spider-Man Homecoming. That's weird. Anyway, here's the former:

 

 

Again, awesome. Now for the, "da hell there's a fifth Pirates of the Caribean movie?!" Yes. Yes, there is and it's called Pirates of the Caribean: Dead Men Tell No Tales

 

Eh, it has Javier Bardem in it. Worth a shot. He'll probably eat the movie. And that's it. That's all we have right now. What you mean there's another? That I'm overlooking a certain franchise. Well, Ghost in the Shell is right here. There wasn't anything really "extended" about it. ..... FINE! Here's the "extended" ad for Transformers: The Last Knight. You have to do this to me don't you?! Remind me of the cinema blight to my eyes that's coming for me! 

 

That's it. SO FAR. If there are more ads. Well, then this article is gonna be updated to have them. I need some Wonder Woman man. Where is an ad for the Wonder Woman movie?! 

 

**UPDATED


Well, this Stranger Things Season 2 teaser trailer will do (I really need to see the first season to this. It looks like a lot of things I would love)!

 

 





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About the Author - Zechs


Zechs is the lord and master of The Toy Shed, Moment of the Week, and Durnkin Reveewz. He's also the official whuppin boy at the Outhouse. So he'll get stuck seeing stuff that no mere mortal should ever see. If there's any greater quality to Zechs, it's that he's an avid fan of comic book characters and would defend them to the bitter end against the companies that use them wrongly. He's also brutally honest. Zechs walks the lonely path in Chicagoland area.

 


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