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Uncanny Avengers Cover Reveals Captain America Gets Fat in Marvel NOW

Written by Jude Terror on Thursday, July 05 2012 and posted in News with Benefits
Uncanny Avengers Cover Reveals Captain America Gets Fat in Marvel NOW

Check out the first look at the cover to Uncanny Avengers #1, the Marvel NOW book launching in October by Rick Remender and John Cassaday!

Today, Entertainment Weekly posted the cover to October's Uncanny Avengers #1, which revealed a major plot point about the outcome of Avengers vs. X-Men: Captain America, so depressed by his fascist actions during the event, binge eats to find some semblance of happiness. Indeed, Cap appears to have put on at least thirty pounds in the cover, and with the increased metabolism afforded him by the Super Soldier Serum, a known performance enhancer, he must have been eating a lot to gain so much so quickly. Perhaps the story will involve Cap finally getting in touch with the true spirit of America, and along with morbid obesity he will finally open up a MySpace account and start watching Nascar.

Comic book fans are no strangers to the perils of obesity. This reporter weighs 800 pounds, and needs to be lifted out of bed by a small crane and placed at my computer desk so I can write snarky articles about comics on the internet, an activity that, shockingly, has not helped me to lose weight. Regardless, we expect our comic books to represent more idealized superheroes in peak physical condition, and, in the case of female superheroes, with big boobies. Hopefully Captain America can get his life back on track and stop reminding us of our own pathetic shortcomings, and go back to kidnapping children and exterminating all mutants.

Cover is posted below. 

Uncanny Avengers Cover Reveals Captain America Gets Fat in Marvel NOW

Written or Contributed by: Jude Terror

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About the Author - Jude Terror

Jude Terror is the Webmaster Supreme of The Outhouse and a sarcastic ace reporter dedicated to delivering irreverent comics and entertainment news to The Outhouse's dozens of loyal readers. Driven by a quest for vengeance, Jude Terror taught himself to program and joined The Outhouse. He instantly began working toward his goal of forcing the internet comics community to take itself less seriously and failing miserably. A certified trash eater ruining the pristine field of comics journalism with his sarcasm and goofiness, Jude Terror is secretly friendly and congenial, so if you've got a complaint, why not just bring it up to him instead of subtweeting like a jackass, jackass? You can find him on Twitter or try your luck with an email, but keep in mind that he is notoriously unreliable and may not get back to you right away. Unless you want to send him free stuff, in which case he'll get back to you immediately.

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