Tuesday, December 12, 2017 • Midnight Edition • "Thoughtful analysis of important cultural issues."

Thomas Jane Punishes The Outhouse Via Email

Written by Jude Terror on Monday, July 16 2012 and posted in News with Benefits
Thomas Jane Punishes The Outhouse Via Email

In an email titled "Hey You! Asshole!", movie star Thomas Jane scolded The Outhouse for association with Zechs, for which no one can blame him.

You may have heard that Thomas Jane, known as at least the third-best actor to ever portray The Punisher and star of the canceled TV show Hung, reprised his role as [A POPULAR CHARACTER] in a short film titled "My Movie," which debuted at San Diego Comic Con. Outhouse staff writer and admitted brony Zechs, overcome with excitement at all the My Little Pony news coming out of comic con over the weekend, published an article that spoiled the "plot" of the movie without posting spoiler tags, angering Jane deeply. Jane sent us an email today expressing his displeasure with this.

The Outhouse apologizes for, as Jane said in his email, "a guy named zechs blowing the whole plot of my shortfilm in a quick article on your site."

"why?  what is cool about that?" asked Jane, who was obviously too distraught to use capitalization.

Nothing, sir. Nothing at all.

The fact is, The Outhouse doesn't expect our readers to comprehend the incoherent rantings about "hobgoblins" and "richarddsssss" that Zechs frequently posts, so it did not occur to us to vet his article for potential spoilers. We have, however, rectified the situation by placing a spoiler warning in the article.

For those wondering what the fuss is all about, we will post another description of the movie below, this time, with adequate warning that the description contains spoilers, and you might want to go and "experience the film firsthand instead of having it blown for them by a guy who 'saw it first.'"

Spoiler Alert!

Last Chance!

Spoilers Below!

The Punisher kills people.

The Outhouse hopes that Thomas Jane will accept our humble apologies and perhaps join us for an interview. In exchange, we will punish Zechs with a bare-bottom spanking from Outhouse Standards and Practices Chief Stoneman.

Zechs could not be reached for comment last night, though he was last seen disappearing into a bathroom cubicle with a stack of Doctor Doom and Hobgoblin comics, an old Punisher t-shirt, and a handful of little blue pills.

It is thought that he may be some time.

UPDATE: This reporter responded to Mr. Jane's email with an apology, a condemnation of the vile Zechs, and a mention of this retraction, and Mr. Jane seemed to respond favorably, for which we have much respect. Unlike the actions of Zechs, it is very cool to have a sense of humor about yourself, and it is also very cool to make a short film which serves no real purpose other than as a gift to fans. Thumbs up from the Outhouse, Thomas Jane. The offer to give an interview lambasting Zechs remains open.

Written or Contributed by: Jude Terror

Help spread the word, loyal readers! Share this story on social media:

Comment without an Outhouse Account using Facebook

We get it. You don't feel like signing up for an Outhouse account, even though it's FREE and EASY! That's okay. You can comment with your Facebook account below and we'll take care of adding it to the stream above. But you really should consider getting a full Outhouse account, which will allow you to quote posts, choose an avatar and sig, and comment on our forums too. If that sounds good to you, sign up for an Outhouse account by clicking here.

Note: while you are welcome to speak your mind freely on any topic, we do ask that you keep discussion civil between each other. Nasty personal attacks against other commenters is strongly discouraged. Thanks!
Help spread the word, loyal readers! Share this story on social media:

About the Author - Jude Terror

Jude Terror is the Webmaster Supreme of The Outhouse and a sarcastic ace reporter dedicated to delivering irreverent comics and entertainment news to The Outhouse's dozens of loyal readers. Driven by a quest for vengeance, Jude Terror taught himself to program and joined The Outhouse. He instantly began working toward his goal of forcing the internet comics community to take itself less seriously and failing miserably. A certified trash eater ruining the pristine field of comics journalism with his sarcasm and goofiness, Jude Terror is secretly friendly and congenial, so if you've got a complaint, why not just bring it up to him instead of subtweeting like a jackass, jackass? You can find him on Twitter or try your luck with an email, but keep in mind that he is notoriously unreliable and may not get back to you right away. Unless you want to send him free stuff, in which case he'll get back to you immediately.

More articles from Jude Terror
The Outhouse is not responsible for any butthurt incurred by reading this website. All original content copyright the author. Banner by Ali Jaffery - he's available for commission!