Saturday, December 20, 2014 • Evening Edition • "Manufacturing outrage since 2006."

Satire

Did you bother to look at the tags before assuming this crazy story was straight news?
S.H.I.E.L.D. Returns Tonight, But Fans Losing Interest in Complaining About It

S.H.I.E.L.D. Returns Tonight, But Fans Losing Interest in Complaining About It

Excitement for bitching about the show is waning as quality improves and fans pine for new episodes after long breaks.

CBR Wants Pictures of Your Dick

CBR Wants Pictures of Your Dick

In hopes of obtaining lots of pictures of dicks, ComicBookResources has started an Instagram account.

Comic Industry Reacts as DC Occupies Image's Utility Closet

Comic Industry Reacts as DC Occupies Image's Utility Closet

Some publishers are condemning the move, while others are urging for a diplomatic end to the escalating crisis.

Marvel Staff Reacts as Bear Enters Marvel Office

Marvel Staff Reacts as Bear Enters Marvel Office

A wild animal was spotted in the Marvel offices and was subdued by the staff.

Will Samuel Jackson Return for Rumored New Matrix Trilogy?

Will Samuel Jackson Return for Rumored New Matrix Trilogy?

A new rumor claims Warner Bros. is planning a new Matrix Trilogy to compete with Star Wars.

Marvel and DC Announce Joint Crossover Event: Eric Stephenson is a Stinky Doodyface and Superhero Comics are Awesome

Marvel and DC Announce Joint Crossover Event: Eric Stephenson is a Stinky Doodyface and Superhero Comics are Awesome

The story will revolve around the Image Publisher being punched repeatedly in the nuts by Marvel and DC superheroes.

All-Star Western Becomes the Schrodinger's Cat of Comics

All-Star Western Becomes the Schrodinger's Cat of Comics

News reports suggest the comic is both cancelled and not cancelled, while neither at the same time.

WWE Network Off to Spotty Launch as Fans at Past Events Start Chanting for Daniel Bryan, C.M. Punk

WWE Network Off to Spotty Launch as Fans at Past Events Start Chanting for Daniel Bryan, C.M. Punk

The historical footage of classic pro wrestling events is becoming unwatchable due to the revolting fans, and also because they keep chanting for Punk and Bryan.

David Finch Conducts Anatomical Study to Prepare for Wonder Woman

David Finch Conducts Anatomical Study to Prepare for Wonder Woman

The artist is conducting a detailed study of the female figure to prepare him for his upcoming run.

In Wake of Mt. Gox Fiasco, Comic Book Speculators Better Off Than Bitcoin Traders

In Wake of Mt. Gox Fiasco, Comic Book Speculators Better Off Than Bitcoin Traders

As bitcoin prices fall, comic book prices rise, proving that comics have always been the smarter investment.

Eastman and Laird Return to TMNT as 30 Year Anniversary Makes Everyone Feel Old as Hell

Eastman and Laird Return to TMNT as 30 Year Anniversary Makes Everyone Feel Old as Hell

Fans are excited for the reunion of the original creative team, but feeling somewhat melancholy thanks to the reminder of their own pending mortality.

Arizona Mutants Thrilled To No Longer Have To Serve Flatscans

Arizona Mutants Thrilled To No Longer Have To Serve Flatscans

A new law would make it legal for mutant run businesses to refuse to serve humans.

Producers Unable to Locate Hayden Panetteire for Heroes Reunion

Producers Unable to Locate Hayden Panetteire for Heroes Reunion

No one has seen the tiny actress in months, causing friends and family to believe she may have shrunk to subatomic levels.

Marvel Exec Destitute After Taking Reboot Frenzy Too Far

Marvel Exec Destitute After Taking Reboot Frenzy Too Far

Marvel Editor in Chief Axel Alonso is deeply in debt after applying the principles Marvel's constant reboot schedule to his personal life.

In response to Guardians of the Galaxy trailer Sony Releases the Entirety of Amazing Spider-Man 2 This Afternoon on MTV

In response to Guardians of the Galaxy trailer Sony Releases the Entirety of Amazing Spider-Man 2 This Afternoon on MTV

The Outhouse's Sony Pictures The Amazing Spider-Man 2's beat writer Jeff Kromer reports from the press conference.

Top Shelf Introduces New DRM-Free Digital GN Model; Dozens of Puppies Die Instantly

Top Shelf Introduces New DRM-Free Digital GN Model; Dozens of Puppies Die Instantly

Digital comics strike again, leaving nothing but death and destruction in their wake.

WWE TV Negotiations Stall After NBCUniversal Figures Out Wrestling is Fake

WWE TV Negotiations Stall After NBCUniversal Figures Out Wrestling is Fake

Raw and Smackdown may be off the USA Network and Syfy if the companies can't agree to new terms.


Gal Gadot Now Officially Too Buff to Play Wonder Woman

Gal Gadot Now Officially Too Buff to Play Wonder Woman

The actress has been hitting the weights too hard, changing sexist fan complaints from "not buff enough" to "way too buff."

Valentines Day Turns Ugly When Man Admits Preference for Wolverine Over Cyclops

Valentines Day Turns Ugly When Man Admits Preference for Wolverine Over Cyclops

One unlucky couple will be spending the holiday alone thanks to a disagreement over comic books.

The Outhouse is not responsible for any butthurt incurred by reading this website. All original content copyright the author. Banner by Ali Jaffery - he's available for commission!