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Chappy's Blue Plate Specials 2/25/09 - le spoils

My God. I'm actually gonna review a Loeb book. God help us all.

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Appetizer:

hulk10.jpgHulk #10
What the hell is this? A Goddamn set-up issue? In RULK? This is poppycock! Grandmaster and Collector are wagering the fate of the universe on a big dumb fight, and Grandmaster selects Hulk to lead/pick his team. So the Big Green picks his buddies from the original Defenders, but GM flexes the rules a bit and selects them from different time periods, when each has just freshly lost a loved one (Jarella, Shalla-Bal, Dorma, and Clea), adding incentive to fight to the death to win their loves back. So the 4 heroes don't really know each other, and they're all pissed, and Collector reveals they're gonna fight RULK, Tiger Shark, Terrax, and Mordo. At which point GM cheats again and grabs a different Hulk out of the time-stream, who's apparently the smart Pantheon-era "Professor" version. And that's it. WTF, Loeb? I have no idea how these timelines match up; there's no rhyme or reason to having this set-up; the dialogue's typically awful; Terrax ain't fit to lick Surfer's board, much less pose a challenge; last I checked, Galactus would never sweat one or even two Elders of the Universe...hell, I didn't even get the patented RULK silliness of Hulk punching "Tuning-Fork Head", or Namor pimp-sapping the Grandmaster...I got gypped! But what the hell...it's still dumb fun, and the E-MC art is still gorgeous; it's just light fluffy junk food...a perfect appetizer. Against all good taste and sense, I liked it.

greenlantern38.jpg 

Entree:

Green Lantern #38
Yet this left me oddly unsatisfied; the coolest part of this book was learning the secret of the Blue Lanterns' power (they have to be in the presence of a GL for their rings to work); other than that, Hal gets help and overcomes the red ring, becoming tri-colored in the process, Sinestro escapes, Atrocitus escapes, Carol getting Star Sapphired is foreshadowed (and may I say...*yawn*), and the Origins & Omens back-up sucks hind-tit AGAIN; I left unfulfilled.

 

Dessert:

mightyavengers22.jpgMighty Avengers #22
Not as good as last issue, but solid enough; Chthon has fully taken over Pietro's body (but his mind is now trapped in the Darkhold), Wanda uses Iron Man to manipulate Hulk back into the fold after he tries to leave, Jocasta gets broke and Hank fixes her, and the Avengers beat Mordred; pretty standard; art's still weak, but the characterization's good and the action's good and the cast is great; I liked it.


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