Thursday, June 21, 2018 • Midnight Edition • "Trash eaters."

So I Finally Saw.. Shoot 'Em Up (2007)

Written by Zechs on Friday, November 13 2009 and posted in Reviews

Zechs is taking a shot at the Shoot 'Em Up (2007). Will he find it a hit or miss?


I'm a lover of movies, in fact, I love all kinds of movies. Of them all, action movies especially. However, I also do enjoy sci-fi, drama, comedy, and horror. Romance? Eh, if the babe is hot and there are tits to go along with the show it might be deemed possibly watchable for me. Though even then, that so did not help me when I watched The English Patient (1996). Otherwise, I rather watch Batman & Robin (1997) for 24 hours straight than see a cheesy romance flick. Still, I cannot see every movie known to man when they come out, or only hear good stuff about them. Therefore, I'll put my behind down and review the flick. Enter this column, where I finally state was the movie truly worth the price of viewing or not. Oh and yeah, this paragraph will be a regular fixture for a bit due to Outhouse poster Punchy for saying I shouldn't review recent movies.


Ah, Shoot 'Em Up (2007). How I longed to see you for quite a long time. I tried catching you in theaters, but alas, you bombed and then showed up on DVDs. Again, my chances to watch you where thwarted by the fact that there where always other movies, tv show's, or anime on DVD I wanted more. Two years later, I finally got my chance on viewing you thanks to a clearance sale of the local Hollywood Video by me. Now I can finally scratch you off my list as one of the top movies I've always wanted to see but couldn't.

So what is this movie about? Well that's the thing there is a plot, but really this movie literally is just a homage to action films namely of the John Woo variety. So the best way I can say is, this film is about a dude named Mr. Smith (Clive Owen) who interrupts a hit and finds himself neck deep in a huge conspiracy. Though on the plus side the dude knows how to shoot a gun quite well. Thus, wackiness and a huge body count erupt.

The best way I can say when viewing this film is this is pretty much a Bugs Bunny cartoon as written by Frank Miller. Don't believe me? The lead character chews a carrot is always ten steps ahead of a bad guy whose fat pudgy balding dude. You view it either that way or darker take via Last Action Hero (1993) just without that magic ticket crap. That's how insane the action is so one has to view it these numerous ways or else this movie isn't as fun.

There is a very clear love for action movies though unlike Hot Fuzz (2007) it doesn't take much other than the gunplay used and part of the story, which again has a distinct John Woo style. Still, it adds it's own levels of insanity that only a mind like Frank Miller could pen. Honestly if this movie had Nazis, I say this was fully written by him. Anyway, the pieces of action (and one shouldn't be surprised cause they're numerous ones) are pretty well done. Thankfully, as in the spirit of something out of the 1980s or early 1990s cheesy lines after kills are present. What can I say? I know they're cheesy as hell, yet I love them to bits.

shoot.jpgClive Owen does what he plays best, a walking talking bad ass with a nice little twist of hating lots of things. These little moments of him going off on these annoyances are quite good and again couldn't help but chuckle at some of these. Owen also pulls off playing a dude you could honestly see being such a pro with guns. Again, another little thing about him is some of the expressions in his eyes as he's blowing the hell out of the bad guys. They range from serious, to angry, to amused, and then WHAT THE HELL!? Also his character reminds me of what probably the little kid from Home Alone (1990) probably grew up to be, a walking bad ass.

The supporting cast (though really limited to just three other actors) fit the job in their clichéd action movie roles. Monica Belluci does a good job playing the hooker with the heart of gold. Though really the only negative I can say that she does wrong is well placed covering to hide nudity. This for me was the only real negative I had with this movie. Here you have a gal who's naked for many of her flicks, has a sex scene in this movie, and yet doesn't have any tit or ass shots at all in it. Damn why couldn't they go the full mile as they had for everything else? Paul Giamatti, was absolutely entertaining in this movie as a hitman who has a wife and kid whose constantly talking to the former during the brief times of non action we have of him. The dude does ham it up in many of his scenes, but given the character he's playing that's the point and why any scene with him was as entertaining as Owen's Smith. These little quirks about them kept me always interested instead of fast forwarding to the action. Then there's the original Nite Owl, Hollis Mason aka Stephen McHattie who plays Giamatti's boss whose somewhat amusing but really doesn't have much screen time to shine other than bicker to his lackey on why he's so sucking at his job.

shoot2.jpgHonestly, the director of this film, Michael Davis, accomplishes what he sets out to film. That was a nice homage to all those gritty yet humorous 80s and early 90s action movies given how lacking there are of ones nowadays and how pussified American movies are now going with PG-13 instead of a hard R as this film went. Not to mention he actually made me gitty and root for the good guy just blowing the hell out of the bad guys. When you do that in an action film, you're doing it right. Again, this is like Crank 2: High Voltage (2009). You just shut the mind off and utterly enjoy the carnage and mayhem being unleashed on the screen. If you're not a fan of such type of films, then what the heck where you expecting from this film, an Oscar Nomination for Best Picture? Though still, if only this movie had went the full course as the other film it might had shared a perfect score as with my previous reviewed film.


4.9 out of 5

Tune in next week when I take a look at G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra (2009).  


Help spread the word, loyal readers! Share this story on social media:

Comment without an Outhouse Account using Facebook

We get it. You don't feel like signing up for an Outhouse account, even though it's FREE and EASY! That's okay. You can comment with your Facebook account below and we'll take care of adding it to the stream above. But you really should consider getting a full Outhouse account, which will allow you to quote posts, choose an avatar and sig, and comment on our forums too. If that sounds good to you, sign up for an Outhouse account by clicking here.

Note: while you are welcome to speak your mind freely on any topic, we do ask that you keep discussion civil between each other. Nasty personal attacks against other commenters is strongly discouraged. Thanks!
Help spread the word, loyal readers! Share this story on social media:

About the Author - Zechs

Zechs is the lord and master of The Toy Shed, Moment of the Week, and Durnkin Reveewz. He's also the official whuppin boy at the Outhouse. So he'll get stuck seeing stuff that no mere mortal should ever see. If there's any greater quality to Zechs, it's that he's an avid fan of comic book characters and would defend them to the bitter end against the companies that use them wrongly. He's also brutally honest. Zechs walks the lonely path in Chicagoland area.


More articles from Zechs
The Outhouse is not responsible for any butthurt incurred by reading this website. All original content copyright the author. Banner by Ali Jaffery - he's available for commission!