Saturday, February 24, 2018 • Midnight Edition • "Brought to you by the lowest bidder!"

Satire

Did you bother to look at the tags before assuming this crazy story was straight news?
All-New All-Different Say No to 5 Dollar Comics NOW! – Week of 3/01/2017

All-New All-Different Say No to 5 Dollar Comics NOW! – Week of 3/01/2017

Because if you're going to spend $10 in a comic shop, you might as well get more than one comic

The Black Horror of Peele's Get Out and Why We Need More

The Black Horror of Peele's Get Out and Why We Need More

Following the release and success of Jordan Peele's Get Out, will this open the gates for more Black genre (horror/sci-fi) films?

All-New All-Different Say No to 5 Dollar Comics NOW! – Week of 2/22/2017

All-New All-Different Say No to 5 Dollar Comics NOW! – Week of 2/22/2017

Because if you're going to spend $10 in a comic shop, you might as well get more than one comic!

All-New All-Different Say No to 5 Dollar Comics NOW! - Week of 02/08/2017

All-New All-Different Say No to 5 Dollar Comics NOW! - Week of 02/08/2017

Because if you're going to spend $10 in a comic shop, you might as well get more than one comic!

All-New All-Different Say No to 5 Dollar Comics NOW! - Week of 01/25/2017

All-New All-Different Say No to 5 Dollar Comics NOW! - Week of 01/25/2017

A fan-beloved hero lives long enough to become the villain!

Warner Bros Releases First Trailer For  'C.H.I.P.S.'  Remake

Warner Bros Releases First Trailer For 'C.H.I.P.S.' Remake

I'm on the fence about this one. Let's see what you think.

All-New All-Different Say No to 5 Dollar Comics NOW! - Week of 01/04/2016

All-New All-Different Say No to 5 Dollar Comics NOW! - Week of 01/04/2016

This issue: the landscape of the comics industry will be changed forever!

REPORT: Peter David Edging Slowly Toward Full Apology for Romani Statments

REPORT: Peter David Edging Slowly Toward Full Apology for Romani Statments

The writer will accept full responsibility for his actions in early 2017.

Political Shocker: Trump's 1995 Tax Returns Reveal $916 Million Loss in Comics Speculation Market

Political Shocker: Trump's 1995 Tax Returns Reveal $916 Million Loss in Comics Speculation Market

Thanks to buying in big on the early 90s comic book speculation boom, the Republican presidential candidate may have avoided paying taxes for years.

REPORT: Australian Man's Penis Becomes Spider-Man Two Times

REPORT: Australian Man's Penis Becomes Spider-Man Two Times

Look out, Marvel! There's an All-New, All-Different Spider-Man in the neighborhood (of Sydney).

REPORT: Montreal Pit Bull Ban Could Have Negative Consequences for Comic Book Industry

REPORT: Montreal Pit Bull Ban Could Have Negative Consequences for Comic Book Industry

Many comic book creators will be unable to attend next year's Montreal Comic Con thanks to the new law.

DC Comics Officially Confirms Wonder Woman is Bi

DC Comics Officially Confirms Wonder Woman is Bi

The long-held belief has finally become canon thanks to writer Greg Rucka.

Rosetta Spacecraft Deliberately Plows Into Surface of Comet After Reading Latest Issue of Civil War 2

Rosetta Spacecraft Deliberately Plows Into Surface of Comet After Reading Latest Issue of Civil War 2

The probe reportedly preferred to end its existence rather than put up with any more of Marvel's crap.

Due to Clerical Error, Alan Moore Accidentally Endorses Labour Party Politician

Due to Clerical Error, Alan Moore Accidentally Endorses Labour Party Politician

Moore actually meant to endorse J'rmy Ko'orbyn, right hand of Moore's interdimensional patron, the Macedonian Snake God Glycon.

Parents of Dark Horse PR Guy Openly Relieved as Son Gets Real Job

Parents of Dark Horse PR Guy Openly Relieved as Son Gets Real Job

Aub Driver will leave the world of comics to become PR Director of a technology news site.

At Apple Event, Desperate CEO Tim Cook Begs Fans to Pre-Order iPhone 7

At Apple Event, Desperate CEO Tim Cook Begs Fans to Pre-Order iPhone 7

Cook said the company will no longer be able to make the product if customers don't shoulder most of the risk.

Image to Publish New Jonathan Hickman Book Consisting of Nothing But Weird Symbols

Image to Publish New Jonathan Hickman Book Consisting of Nothing But Weird Symbols

The comic, which has no artist, will be the greatest epic in the history of comics.

Final DC Writer's Workshop Revealed to Be Elaborate Death Trap

Final DC Writer's Workshop Revealed to Be Elaborate Death Trap

The final class of comic book writer thought they would receive lessons from Scott Snyder, but instead they received THEIR DOOM!

In Wake of Gene Wilder Passing, World's Top Scientists Tap Comic Book Industry to Reboot Reality

In Wake of Gene Wilder Passing, World's Top Scientists Tap Comic Book Industry to Reboot Reality

Honestly, it's our only hope to salvage this shitty god damn year.

BREAKING: Chaos Erupts at DC EXXXCLUSIVE Contract Signing for Liam Sharp

BREAKING: Chaos Erupts at DC EXXXCLUSIVE Contract Signing for Liam Sharp

Once again, a DC Comics contract signing ends in violence.

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